Internet Date Number One

Went golfing last night with S. It was a blast. Since we were not a foursome we were paired with another couple. They were in their 30’s have three young children at home so were just enjoying some kid free time together. The four of us had a blast.

We laughed easily and often. I think the most important thing to look for in a partner is the ability to laugh together. We all have a list of physical attributes that are so important, he must be over 6 feet tall, she must have long hair, he must have hair, she must have big boob, and on an on. Those things will all disappear one day, he will shrink, she will cut her hair, his may fall out, and those boobs, we all know what direction they are headed!

But if you can make each other laugh… that will last. I am trying to give everyone a chance this time around, not make snap judgments. Last night I was pleasantly surprised. S was cuter than his pictures, but more importantly he was kind, attentive and he made me laugh. He also asked me out again, I’m going to go, who knows where things may lead, even if it’s not anywhere I’m making a new friend and having fun.

My friend Joyce always says, “Who would you love if you were blind?” Although neither one of us lives by that when we are looking for people to date, it’s a nice thought. If you were blind you would love the person who speaks to your heart, not your eyes. I’m trying to remember that, and listen to what someone says to my heart.

Why is it so easy to fall in love with the handsome bad boy who is always doing you wrong? We can forgive them almost anything, because they are just so damn sexy, but let a nice guy do anything the slightest bit wrong and he hits the street so fast his head is spinning. And even when you look at what they do wrong, it’s a no brainer, so why do we do it?

Nice guy- 15 minutes late, but he called, we are still mad that he is inconsiderate of our time

Bad boy- 2 hours late because he was drinking with the boys and lost track of time, we are only mad for a minute, he is just too damn cute when he is making excuses!

Nice guy-believes us when we say we don’t want to go anywhere special for our birthday- and we are pissed because he should know us better than that.

Bad boy- it was your birthday? When, not until next month right? ( He’s just so damn cute)

There are many, many examples, I’m tried to remember those when the nice guy I went out with asked me out a second time.

Internet Dating

Internet dating is the bane of my existence. Ugh. I have decided that meeting Mr. Right is just a numbers game. Like anything else the more you date the better your odds are for meeting the person you can’t live without. Or a stalker, take your pick.



I am on several dating websites again. I hate them, hate everything about them. The pictures lie, the profiles lie, the emails you exchange lie, then you meet, and the lies are worthless.



Why can’t people just tell the truth? Don’t post a picture of you twenty years ago. Do you really think that when you meet someone they are not going to notice that you are twenty pounds heavier and bald? Maybe I like big bald guys, you never know if you don’t put a real picture up there. The same goes with your height, don’t say you are 6ft tall, and then I tower over you in two inch heels, I’m only 5’4”. Trust me, I notice things like this.



Since this is a numbers game, I’ve decided to go out with everyone who asks. This can be a little scary, I may wind up spending two hours of my life with a troll but what the hell. Nothing ventured nothing gained. Besides, in the past, those few I picked as worthy of spending my valuable time with did not turn out all that well. When it comes to choosing good men, I have no clue, so this time I’m not ruling anyone out.



So far, I’ve met two men that I’ve talked to on the phone and had plans to meet in person. The first guy, wasn’t crazy about his profile or his pictures, I’m not a tattoo fan, but I remembered that I was going to go out with everyone. Anyway, a couple sweet emails, a few nice phone conversations and we decide to meet for dinner, at a big mall downtown, so he can take the train, since his truck is a work truck and has lots of expensive tools on it. Ok, I love the train too, I didn’t see a problem.



Until he text me over and over, giving me the spiel about that tools and truck, ok, maybe he doesn’t have a truck, maybe he doesn’t even have a license, but it’s just dinner right?



So we work out the details. When, where, and he is going to text me with the time since his job is not 9-5, I said that was fine. Two hours later I get a text asking why I didn’t answer his last text about when and where. My response- What? So again he tells me about the truck, yadda, yadda, yadda. I tell him we’ve had this conversation before.



His response “ so I’m brain dead, I can’t even argue with that, but for shits and giggles can you tell me what we decided?



Seriously? We are talking a two hour time lapse. RUN!!!!!!!



Maybe I won’t date EVERYONE who asks me. This guy either is dating every woman under the sun and can’t keep us straight or he has a drug problem and can’t keep anything straight. Not my cup of tea..



Tonight I have a golf date. He seems very nice. Physically, not my usual type, but I’m dating everyone, remember. He can carry on a conversation, remember my name, seems to be fairly active and has not exhibited any stalker qualities. This one may be a keeper ladies! At the very least, I will spend two hours golfing and laughing, whether he laughs or not, because I am determined to enjoy these dates, if only to have lots of details to share with my blogging friends!

It's all a numbers game

Dating, how much fun is that? Those of you who know me, know that I have been married three times, that's right, three, wanna make something of it? Apparently I'm really good at getting married, not so good at staying married.

I have all the typical excuses, it wasn't me, it was them, I made bad choices, they pretended to be something they weren't, yada, yada, yada. Oh hell with it, it was me. I wanted something more. I know what I want, I just don't know how to get it. How to stop thinking I can turn every frog into Prince Charming.

Dating is a numbers game and I was never very good at math. In order to meet your Mister Right you gotta kiss a lot of frogs. Ok, I'm puckered up, where are the frogs? You have to put yourself out there, go new places, try new things, meet new people. It sounds like a travel brochure.

I put myself out there. I think I've been a member of every online dating site there is, at least once, some multiple times. It's all fun and games until it comes to actually meeting people. I'm good with emailing, texting,talking on the phone, but as soon as he says " Let's meet for coffee" I'm looking for a way out.

I hate first dates. I'm goofy, I laugh when people trip and hurt themselves, I say inappropriate things, sometimes I laugh until I snort whatever beverage I'm drinking out of my nose. Not the best first impression. I try to rein that in and what happens?

The last man I dated thought I was very reserved. Me, reserved? We dated for two months and when he said that I wasn't even sure he had ever met me. I streak on New years eve, every year, I've been known to tell dirty jokes- to my gynecolgist during an exam, I taught my neice all the foul language she knows. Reserved, really?

I gotta stop that. I'm not reserved, do I really care what they think? If they won't like me I should find out up front, not two years down the road when I let my guard down.

I went on a date with the brother of a friend, I liked him, he told her he didn't think I was into him. Where is the middle ground? Maybe I'm reserved on the first few dates because I've dated so many weirdos who didn't respect my personal space.

Like Mr Winky. He is famous in my circle of friends, the only man I ever dated who, about two hours into our first date, was masturbating on the couch when I returned from the bathroom. We hadn't even kissed yet, not sure what made him think that was the next logical step.

I got him back though. I grabbed my purse and headed for the door, laughing my ass off. He jumped off the couch and came after me. At the door we were greeted by his dog chewing on my tampon applicator, little present for him to clean up after making me need therapy before I could date again.

So, maybe I am reserved, maybe there is a reason for it. But maybe it's time to say the hell with it. Just be me, whoever that is, and see what happens.

Internet dating and golf

I don’t like internet dating. For the most part it is awkward, weird and not at all fun. People are usually nothing like the tiny little profile they present online, but more about that later.

One of the best dates I ever had was from the internet. Brian contacted me online, we emailed, moved to phone calls, and in general were able to talk and make each other laugh. I still didn’t want to go when we finally arranged a date. I actually backed out the first time, some sorry excuse about my daughter and her first period, which he understood as he has daughters as well. Such an understanding man.

Anyway, the second time we arranged a date I didn’t feel like I could back out, so I made the trek from Sandy to Logan because I don’t like the internet crazy’s to know where I live. We were going golfing, now that made me laugh! Having never hit a golf ball in my life I thought we were both in for a frustrating day, to say the least.

I was pleasantly surprised that Brian looked exactly like the picture he had posted on the dating website, and he was exactly who he seemed to be on the phone. Score! Within minutes I felt like I had known him forever.

He was a lifetime Air Force man, his son gave golf lessons at the Air Force base, so off we went. First we hit some balls from the little green thingy and there was a man in a motorized cart collecting all the golf balls in the field so Brian and Derrick were trying to hit him with a golf ball while I laughed until I almost peed my pants.

Then it was onto the course. I was nervous, especially when they paired us up with two older men who owned actual golf pants. Fortunately they were all very patient with me, even laughing at the weird little baby stepping, butt shaking dance I had to do to get my feet in the right place.

It was the best internet date ever. We were singing and making up rules and skipping and eating hotdogs from a little shack on the course. All in all a good day was had by all…… Too bad he wasn’t really divorced……….another reason I hate internet dating!