Now That I'm Someone Else

LIfe and loves of the bubble bath queen

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Baseball, black eyes and trailer trash

I just got off the phone with a friend and we were talking about how klutzy people can be. I said that I never really had that problem, thank God. She laughed and said "Really? Where have you been for the last couple years?"
Gotta love those friends who never, ever let you forget all the stupid things you have done. Since this blog is all about over sharing and giving you way too much information about my life, here we go again!
A few years ago I was on a coed softball team at work. I played second base, something I was very proud of since I wasn't all that athletic as a kid. I was good at it, I can catch and I can throw, not far but being in the infield you don't have to throw far. Anyway, it was our first 9 o'clock game. We were in the outfield when the pitcher threw the ball to me because someone was rounding second. I lost the ball in the lights and caught it with my eye. I dropped to my knees not really sure where the ball had hit me, just that it had, and I wasn't going to let all these people I worked with see me cry. Don tried to help me up but I just kept crying for Angie, she was in the outfield, we worked together.
Angie came running in, helped me up, took one look at my eye and told her boyfriend, who was the pitcher, that we needed to go to the hospital.
We go to the hospital, I get seven stitches all while my sister makes fun of her boyfriend for hitting me with the ball.
In the morning, I call in to work, no way am I going to work with a black eye and stitches. I send Mo off to school and start cleaning the house. About an hour later I get a phone call from the principal asking me to come pick Mo up because she has been suspended for PDA (public display of affection) She's in eight grade.
I call Steve to see if he will go get her, I don't want to be seen like this and I figure he will lecture her so much I won't have to. Not gonna happen, he is working over an hour away. Shit.
I go to school, try not to make eye contact with anyone, sit in the principal's office while he tells me what a delinquent my child is and what can I say? I am the poster child for spousal abuse. Eventually he feels sorry for me and stops lecturing me and turns my child over to me.
We walk to the car, my blood is boiling but I don't want them to call child protective services so I wait until we are in the car to start yelling.
" What were you thinking? Holy hell, can't you just go to school and stay out of trouble? Look at me, do you think I wanted to come out looking like this? I work so freaking hard so you have a good life, not a white trash life, a good life, and this is what I get?"
" Mom, I didn't do anything! Stop yelling at me, it wasn't my fault!"
I'm about to lose my mind " Mo, I come to school, with a black eye to pick you up because you have been suspended for PDA in the hallway, with a GIRL no less, we look like white trash. They probably think your father beats me."
" Don't worry Mommy, they all know you and Daddy are divorced."
"Great, they think my boyfriend beats me, that's soooooooo much better."
Just a friendly reminder that we are all just a black eye away from the trailer we came from and this is just the first of my klutzy moments. Next time, I actually fall out of a house.

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